Second Best
by M.D.1934
Summary: Ginny, Hermoine, and now Harry's POV on Harry and Hermione's friendship. DH SPOLILERS
1. Second Best

**Disclaimer: I don;t own HP**

**Ginny P.O.V**

I watched them out of our kitchen window. My husband, the famous Harry Potter, was sitting with his back against the oak tree in the front yard. He was laughing, clearly happy. He didn't have a care in the world. He didn't have the weight of the world on his sholders anymore. He deafeated Voldemort many years ago. Now he was free to live his life. I watched as he bust into another fit of giggles. This bothered me. Not the fact that he was happy, it was the fact of why he was happy.

Reluctantly, I shifted my gaze down to the person's head that was in his lap. She had curly brown hair and warm colored eyes. She was none other than Hermione Granger. Well I guess she was Hermione Weasley now. Don't ask me when they became so close. Maybe it was while they were at Hogwarts, but I wouldn't really know. I was never really in their adventures much. The only ones that I was in were in my 1st and 6th years. I shuddered as I thought of them. In my first year I became possessed by a part of Voldemort's soul. I still can't remeber what I did, but I still had nightmares about what could have been. The other, was of course the battle of Hogwarts where Harry defeated Voldemort. In this battle I lost my brother Fred Weasley along with many friends. Anyways back to the topic at hand.

Harry and Hermione were excedenly close now. Even Ron saw it. I think that he's a little better at handling it rather than I am. It can't be easy seeing your wife so comfortable around another man. Seeing her sharing things with him that she wouldn't even tell you. I know that it kills me inside. And what's even more unbelievable is the fact that Harry and Hermione don't even notice how that act around each other!

They were always touching each other. Wether it's a brush of the hand or they start a tickle fight, it's like they're always connected at some point. I can't tell you how many times I've watched Harry tackle her out of nowhere, pin her to the ground, and tickle her until she pleads and begs. I couldn't tell you how many times I've had to look up a counterspell or beg Hermione to fix him after she jinxed him for tickling her. I see them exchange worried glances at each other all the time, like they fear the other person will disappear in a puff of smoke. Oh and their eyes! Urg! I can't even begin to tell you how much it drives me crazy to watch them have conversations without even speaking. They just look at each other and suddenly wham, a decison made and not one word spoken!

Take today for instance. I don't know how long I've been watching this exchange. Harry just sits there against that stupid tree with her head laying in his lap. He idly plays with her hair while they share some more stories. Me? I think I'll blame the tree for this one. Afterall, I can't blame Harry or Hermione. Ron and I made that mistake once, the aftermath of which I don't care to repeat. They were so mad. I thought for a while that Harry was going to leave me. I know that he almost didn't purpose to me because of it. I overheard him telling Hermione. Yes so I'll just blame that stupid tree! Maybe I'll burn it down later. Then they couldn't site against it and exculde everyone from their private world.

I let out a sigh. Even if the tree was gone they would just find something else to sit against. Somtimes I wonder if they only stayed with Ron and I because of the kids. Sometimes I swear I can see regert in Harry's eyes when he looks at me. Like he picked the wrong woman or something. Nights where he'd have nightmares about the battle, I would sit by and watch him run to Hermione. Oh how I wished I was the person he ran to.

I remeber when Harry and I first announced our engagement. The wizarding world couldn't believe it. I read countless articles on how people thought that it would be 'Hermione Potter' instead of me. Our first few years of marrage we both read many articles talking about how everyone was waiting for him to leave me for her. After Hermione married Ron and we all had kids the articles stopped. But whenever we go out you can see people stare and begin to whisper as if they're still waiting for it to happen. Truth be told...so am I.

Ron walked up behind me and gave my sholder a re-assuring squeeze before joining the other members of the Golden Trio by the tree. I sighed once more and looked down at the 2 rings on my finger. I'm the lucky one I tell myself. I won, I married him, he chose me. I put on a false smile and walked out into the yard. My head is begining to believe all the things I tell myself. But in my heart; compared to Hermione, I'll always be second best.


	2. Second Chance

**Hermione's P.O.V**

Days like this were perfect. I felt a slight twinge of guilt as I thought about what made them so great. It wasn't the fact that it was a beautifil day, it wasn't the fact that all the horrors I have had in my life are no longer there, no- the reason my was him. I knew it was wrong, the way I was feeling, but feelings weren't something that you can easily control. They were just there, some happen and never go away. And the way I felt about Harry Potter was a feeling that I was sure, would never change. I was married. To a great man I might add. I had kids, they were amazing and I couldn't ask for better ones. Harry was married too, to one of my best friends. We had lives. I couldn't fight off the guilt that flooded through me as I thought about how I really wanted my life to be. Sure it was alot better not worring about getting killed every waking moment, but _my _life just wasn't complete. I was happy, but I felt like something was always missing.

"What are you so deep in thought about?" Harry asked, looking down at me. He twisted my curly brown hair around in his fingers.

I let out a sigh and ajusted my head that was in his lap. "Do ever wonder how different out lives could be?"

He gave me a confused look. "Aren't you happy Mione?"

I gave him a false smile. He probably saw right though it. "No I am, everything's great. Its just..." I trailed off not really knowing how to form my thoughts into words.

"You wonder if we made the right choices." He finished my sentence for me. I laughed lightly.

"Sometimes I wonder if you can read my mind Harry." He began to laugh with me. "But yes I do wonder. I mean I can't be the only one of us that feels this way?" I pondered for a momnet. "Harry do you think that's its wrong for me to feel this way?"

He shook his head. "Mione you can't help what you feel." I watched as he shifted his back against the tree. "You aren't the only one that feels it. I feel it too." The last sentence came out as a whisper. "So are we being completely honest with each other?"

I flashed a grin which he mirrored. "Oh course. We can always be honest with each other."

He sighed. "That's part of the problem." I wasn't sure but I guess that confusion played across my face. "Oh it's not a bad thing. I don't think. It's just that...I can trust you with everything. I mean who do I always come running to when I have a problem? You. It's always been like that. I tell you things that I don't tell Ginny. It's like I have this huge hole that just can't be fixed no matter what I do. I don't understand why it has to be this way."

I understood what he was saying. I told him everything. Everything I thought, everything I felt. It was like he was a part of me. Maybe too big a part. Bigger than Ron. Things were supposed to be great for us. They were...in theory. We shouldn't feel this way. We deserive happiness after everything that we've been though, Harry expecially. So why was everything so hard for us? Why did we put this facade of happiness on everyday? Did everyone else see this? Are we really that blind? I always knew that I was more comfortable around Harry than anyone else. We were always joking around with each other, playing, laughing, we were _happy. _But only when we were together. Now I knew why that was. It was like a slap to the face. I chose _wrong_. I was always thinking with my head years ago. Never taking the time to listen to my heart. Now that I finally was it was 20 years too late. There was a saying that life always handed you second chances. This was one second chance I knew I could never have.

" Harry...I know how hard it is. But we have to remind oursleves that things turned out for the best." Wow, I just told the biggest lie of my life.

He nodded and I saw saddness fill in those emerald eyes of his. I began to wish I could read his mind. There was something that he wasn't telling me. Yet then again, maybe it wasn't my place to know. I heard footsteps and I sat up to see Ron walking up to us. Ginny was right behind him. Suddenly I felt my perfect day slipping away.

"Hun It's going to rain soon." Ron informed me. "We should get going."

I looked up at the sky to see dark clouds rolling in. I didn't even notice the clear sky fade away from eariler. How ironic. I nodded and he helped me to my feet. After I was up, Ron reached down and gave Harry a hand.

Ginny came forward and gave me a hug. "Come again soon. We really don't get to see enough of each other."

"We will." I assured her. I couldn't help but feel that she was faking her emotions. Well if she was she wasn't the only one around her. I began to wonder if Harry and I were the only ones that were unhappy around here.

Harry pulled me into a tight hug. "Someday." I whispered in his ear. When we pulled apart he shot me a meaningful look and I understood that he got the message. I grabbed Ron's hand and we apparated away.

That night we ate in silence. We made small talk but it didn't get much futher than that. Ron was putting an effort into it, but I wasn't holding up my fair share of conversation. Finally it was late enough where I could go to bed without Ron thinking anything weird. I changed quickly into my night clothes and hoped into my side of the bed. The bed was cold but it didn't bother me the way it normally would. My mind was swarming with thoughts and memories. One memory stood out. It was when Harry told me about the night of the battle where he walked out into the woods to die. He told me about the Hallow that he used to see his parents and Sirius.

So if he could talk to them...then maybe there was an afterlife. And maybe...just maybe I would get my second chance after all. I smiled and closed my eyes hoping to get to sleep soon. Where I was sure he would be waiting for me.

A/N: This was at first going to be a one shot with ginny but you liked it so much that I decided to post another part. I hope that you like it. I will be added another chap soon with harry's pov. Sorry for the previous mistake in the last chap. I was half asleep when I wrote it.


	3. Too Late

**Harry POV**

I knew it shouldn't be like this. I have had so much unhappiness in my life, therefore when I feel happiness I automaticly know it. I could tell you that this was not it. It was hard to believe that so many people thought me to be happy. I guess I'm a better actor than what people tell me. I've been through so much in my life, I'm begining to wonder if it will ever end. It was bad enough when I was fighting real demons, now I have to fight my inner ones too. Although everything seems fine, I still have nightmares at night. I know it's pretty pathetic for a grown man to have nightmares isn't it? I still dream about all my enounter with Voldermort. I still look over my sholder all the time waiting for the next attack, I know I'm parnoid. But don't you think I have a right to be? I have to constantly remind myself that Voldemort's gone. Remind myself that I was the one to vanquish him. But no matter how many times I told myself that, I still had the fear. But one thing always remained the same, I was still afraid to lose the ones I cared about. Ron and Hermione had been there with me through everything. Nothing in this world could ever show them how much they mean to me. Although, over the years I've began to notice how one seems to mean more to me than the other.

Ok so maybe I just didn't notice, maybe I've always known how I felt for Hermione. I knew it while we were still at Hogwarts. I hate myself everyday for not telling her. I can't even begin to tell you how hard it was for me to be alone with her all that time while hunting Voldermort. Everynight to listen to her cry and know that it was over Ron. Then she finally began to cheer up and I began to think that maybe I did have a chance afterall. That is until he came back. I'll never admit it, but the day Ron left was a happy day for me. I was mad that he left don't get me wrong, and I was mad that he hurt Hermione, but I was so happy to finally be alone with her. I thought that maybe if it was just the two of us, then maybe there would be hope. She shyed away from me however and I was too afraid to tell her just how much I needed her. So I began to focus on Ginny to clear my thoughts of Hermione. Though I always knew that I could count on Hermione for anything. She proved this to me time and time again. I was so close to telling her at the Last Battle. Then I saw her kiss Ron and everything fell apart. I gave half a thought to just staying dead after witnessing that. It was like she threw my heart out and stomped on it. I wouldn't blame her if she did, she wouldn't know that she was doing it. All because I was too much of a coward. I truly sometimes hate myself.

Finally everything was said and done. Voldemort was dead and I could live a normal life. Although I would rather face Voldemort any day over watching her and Ron together. It makes me sick. I can't tell you how many times I've wanted to pull her aside and tell her. I can't tell you how many times I almost did. But then I saw how happy she was with Ron and I decided that as long as she was happy then everything would be alright. I began to date Ginny again. I was going to ask her to marry me until one night she freaked out because I missed dinner. Well, she freaked because I missed it to help Hermione. I decided that if she couldn't accept the fact that Hermione was a part of me, then I couldn't be with her. I left her. I felt horrible for doing it because contrary to what you may think I do care for Ginny. Just not as much as I do Hermione. Hermione eventually talked me back into asking her. I wish she wouldn't have. I wish she would have told me that I was doing the right thing and said that she loved me. But I should know by now that _my _dreams never come true.

I was married, Ron and Hermione followed shortly after. It was the hardest day of my life to hear the minister ask if anyone objected and keep my mouth shut. I noticed that when he did ask Hermione's eyes floated to mine, and a part of me wonders if she did want me to say something. I suppose now I'll never know. If that wasn't bad enough, Hermione and I got even closer from then to now. I didn't even think that was possible! Now I tell her everything, well everything but one secret that will never escape my lips. She tells me things too. Things that neither of us share with our spouces. I have dreams of losing her all the time. Sometimes I wonder if I haven't already. I know that you must think that I'm a horrible horrible person for saying that I love someone more than my wife, but you can't help the things you feel. But I feel guilty too. I feel guilty at the fact that I can't love Ginny as much as she deserves. That I can never be as close to her as I am Hermione no matter how hard I try.

Then we go and have a day like today. Everything was perfect. Then she began to ask me if I regretted anything. Oh how I wanted to scream out that the biggest regret of my life was letting her go. Not that I ever had her to begin with. As she talked I realized that she loved me too. Not in the brother way or the best friend kind of way, but she felt the same love for me as I did her. I wanted to fling myself off a cliff after figuring this out. She knew that we both chose wrong. She, like me, also knew that it was too late to change anything.

I walked over to my bed and ran my fingers through my messy hair. With a sigh, I layed down onto the bed and pulled the covers over me. I knew I was going to have nightmares tonight. But this time it wasn't going to be about pain or death. It was going to be a nightmare, where if it was in anyone elses head, it would be lovely. It would be a nightmare about what could have been.

Thanks and I think that this will be the last chap I wirte for this. I know that some of you want me to write one for Ron but his would basically be Ginny's POV rewritten. Thanks for reading and I hope you liked it.


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